My brother is
getting married in July. Both he and his bride live here. However, the bride is
from another town, about 5 hours away. The wedding will take place in her home
town. We (my parents I) have some questions regarding the rehearsal
dinner.
1) Is it proper
to have the rehearsal dinner at the bride's parents' home?
2)Who is usually invited to the rehearsal dinner?
3)What part does the brides' family have in the planning of the dinner?
4) What are the responsibilities of the groom's family for the rehearsal dinner?
Traditionally, the
rehearsal dinner is the responsibility of the groom's family unless there are
extenuating circumstances, such as in your case. Your parents should first talk
to your brother to find out what he and his fiancιe want. Then, they should
approach her parents, if they have volunteered their home. No matter where the
dinner is held, your parents should offer to pay for the food. Everyone who is
in the wedding party should be invited to the dinner, along with their spouses.
The children in the wedding party should be accompanied by their parents. The
minister and spouse and wedding coordinator should also be invited. It is
a courtesy, but not a requirement, to also invite relatives and close friends
who have come from out of town rather than leaving them at a hotel alone for the
evening. It sounds as though the bride's family may have overstepped their role
and have planned the dinner already. If this is the case, and your brother and
his fiancιe are happy with the arrangements, I would let them go ahead and
handle the arrangements. However, your parents should still offer to pay for the
food. They do not have to pay for alcohol, though, if they would not have served
it at a dinner that they planned. If the bride's parents refuse to accept
payment, you have at least done what is socially proper.
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Glenna Tooman, Wedding Expert, ForeverWed.com
Memory Makers Event Planning, LLC
http://www.memorable-events.com