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Q.
My daughter is getting married,
her Dad & step mom have been generous to provide for
the wedding. They are involved every step of the
way with all final decisions left to the step mom. I have not
been included in any of the planning (nor was I invited to
look at wedding dresses, etc.) I think I understand that if
the step mom is paying she should make all the decisions(?)
A.
You are nice to look at it this way, but no matter who's
paying it does seem odd that you are not being included more
by the bride. I imagine that hurts a lot.
Some people feel that "he who pays gets to choose", however,
for weddings this isn't as legitimate as in some other
situations. I think actually the right a parent has is to
decide how much they will pay. What the money is spent on is
not necessarily up to them. That can become quite a power
play. Hopefully that is not the case with your daughter's
father and step mother.
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