Maid of Honor - Maid of Honor Etiquette

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Q. I recently have been asked to be the Maid of Honor in a co-worker/friend's wedding. We aren't super close, but do have a good time together at work. I felt a bit pressured to say "yes", but wasn't feeling like I could handle the time and financial responsibilities involved. I want to be there for her during her planning process, but am afraid that I cannot give her 100% of my time. My boyfriend and I are at a critical financial point in our lives, and I feel that I will not have "alot" to offer as the host of her bridal shower. I am planning on having a discussion with her next week about this...sharing my concerns and expressing my fears of maybe I'm not the "right" person for this duty. I will be there for her in this role if she wants but want her to! understand where I'm coming from. Is there a kosher way of letting her down? if I agree to follow through, while letting her know my concerns both financially and time commitment wise, is there an etiquette in letting others (friends, family, bridal party, etc.) know that I will NOT be paying for everything in respect to the bridal shower? Can I get help from her mother (who is a bit more "well off" than I)?

A. Being an attendant-especially The Maid of Honor is a huge responsibility-you're very correct. My best advice to you is to talk to The Bride and let her know exactly how you feel--it's clear that you don't mean to hurt her feelings whatsoever. But it's better to let her know sooner than later. You don't want to commit to this, then halfway through take yourself out. Just let her know that you've given the idea a great amount of thought and want her wedding to be absolutely perfect. Maybe the two of you can come to some compromise as far as time and money are concerned. Honesty is really the best policy this time.

I hope this helps you out. Please feel free to contact us again with any other questions or to follow up. Good Luck!

--Lauren Swarts, ForeverWed.com Wedding Consultant

Christian Bride Wedding Store

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Choose from a great selection of quality Engravable gifts for your bridesmaids, junior bridesmaids, flower girl or any member of the wedding party!