What is the most given current cash gift amount. When I married 30 years ago,
it seemed to be $25.00? Also, is a dressy pants suit acceptable for a 4:00 pm wedding with reception of
heavy hors d'oeuvre at a golf country club in Charleston, SC. I live in FL,
where almost anything goes for any event..
The one other method I have heard for determining the amount of a
wedding gift is to double what you would give if you were giving this
person a birthday gift.
This is not a formal etiquette rule, but something I have seen in use by
guests, and it seems pretty reasonable to me. Not all of us have the
same gift giving practices-- or the same finances-- so a
one-size-fits-all amount has never seemed appropriate to me. A rule of
thumb like this "double a birthday" amount makes sense because it allows
for the gift giver's personality and budget, as well as the social
practices of their area and social circle.
As for your attire question, from your description, it's hard to say. I
know that in some of the southern states besides Florida, customary
dress tends to be a little more formal. Also, the time of day and
country club location would generally indicate a little dressier
expectation of attire too.
However, if the "dressy" pants suit is VERY dressy, or if the guest list
is not extremely large (meaning there would be lots of business and
extended acquaintances, rather than mostly friends and family), I would
think it might well be appropriate.
Is there someone you can call to ask? I know people feel that they
'should know', but so many times it makes things easier if you just call
the parents or who ever you are most comfortable with, and ASK how
formal it will be. They can't always give you perfect information, but
it would be something more to go on.
If you absolutely cannot call someone in the family, you could even
consider calling the country club, asking to speak to someone involved
in their wedding services, and ask what is most common for weddings held
there. That, again, wouldn't be definitive, but could give you a
general idea of what might be considered customary for that location in
that city.
Best wishes--
Foreverwed.com expert-- Sara L. Ambarian
author of "A Bride's Touch: A Handbook of Wedding Personality and
Inspiration"/ creative consultant/ custom bridal designer
mailto:sara@www.foreverwed.com
For more wedding information:
http://www.foreverwed.com/~sara
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