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Honoring Your Non-Christian Parents


As it turns out, the decision about having or not having alcohol is often one of the trickiest when it comes to being a Christian with non-Christian parents and family members. Jen Bingham, a 25-year-old wife of nearly four years shares, "I never really got too embarrassed by my non-Christian parents during the events, except when my dad gave his toast at the wedding. I know he had great intentions, but his speech turned out to be words slurred with pure drunkenness.

"I just had to remember that my dad's intentions were pure and how hard it was for him to lose his little girl, which helped me get over it," says Bingham.

Others have handled the whole alcohol situation slightly differently. "We ended up compromising," says Haygood.

"We didn't have alcohol at the rehearsal or at the wedding, but my family went out for drinks before the rehearsal and they tolerated the dinner without it. As far as the wedding, we decided to have it at 11:30 a.m. which eliminated the alcohol issue for the most part. My momjust decided to have her own 'After the Reception, Reception.' In the end, it all turned out wonderfully and I didn't hear anyone (except my family) complain about not having alcohol."

But the issue of whether or not to serve alcohol is just one of many obstacles Christian brides face when planning their weddings. Some non-Christian parents may not want you to include any elements of your faith in your ceremony. And while it's easy to say to a Christian bride, "don't compromise your standards," it creates a sticky situation when Mom and Dad are paying for the event.

"My parents are Jewish, and since they were paying for the wedding, I felt obligated to hear them out on what they had in mind for the ceremony," says 26-year-old Michelle Colton. "It became a huge problem when they alluded to having an extremely short service without any Christian elements because they didn't want to be uncomfortable or to alienate their Jewish friends and family members who would be attending."Ordained Pastor Jim Gum empathizes with brides in this situation. "You have to tread wisely with what you're willing to compromise. It's difficult to honor your father and mother if you're just taking their money but not listening to their concerns and wishes."

So where do you draw the line between honoring your parents while staying true to your Christian faith?


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